Spotlight On: Six Fears We All Have Under The Covers (And Just Don’t Admit)

Over the last number of months, we’ve learned a thing or two about the wide range of contraceptives that are available on the market today. Now, we are going to continue our focus on health by studying a wide range of topics relating to sex and sexual health. Last week, we focused on ways to achieve that perfect orgasm while this week, we'll be looking at problems in the bedroom. _____________________________________________________________ We all like to maintain that we’re having the best sex ever, and that each time you get between the sheets with your partner, it absolutely blows your mind. But often, whatever you might say or portray in public, doesn’t always add up to the reality of sexy time for you. Don’t worry ladies, you’re not alone. Here’s the most common worries and fears that women have in the bedroom – and we’ve some tips to help you overcome them. Duck 'n dive Unfortunately, some of us bring a lot of our insecurities into the bedroom, and while that’s natural enough, it doesn’t equate to loads of fun under the covers. Many of us are guilty of spectacular dives under the duvet before he catches a glimpse of your body. It also sees a lot of us settle for second best when it comes to sex – it’s not all one-way traffic ladies, you’re entitled to have your moment in the sun too. Let him know what you like and if you’re too afraid to put it into words, show him what you want. There’s no point faking it ladies, as not only will you be left feeling unsatisfied, but he won’t know next time what he needs to do to help you on your way. I just wish it was over Some women can lose interest in sex and often, just wish the whole thing was over as quickly as possible. Don’t worry though, there are a lot of reasons that this may happen and doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ve fallen out of lust or love with your partner. Stress, being overtired and pain during sex are all proven to have a big effect on a woman’s libido. Also, if there are problems within the relationship that haven’t been dealt with or talked about, this can linger on a woman’s mind and ensure that she can’t relax properly when it comes to sexy time. Sex is one of life’s great joys, so figure out what’s causing your anxiety and get help to deal with it. It’ll be worth it, we promise. That awkward moment when… Sex can be awkward, it can be messy and the best way to deal with any embarrassing moments that happen is to laugh. Those cringey noises (yes, admit it, we’ve all been there), the moans, the groans, the ‘oops, that doesn’t go there’ moments – we’ve all had them. Laughter really is the best medicine and remember, sex is supposed to be fun – so banish that red face and have a giggle. The talk… And we don’t mean the ‘what are we doing, is this officially a thing?’ talk. No, we mean the equally awkward talk about contraception and STIs. The majority of us are mortified having the conversation and believe us, it never gets any easier. On the flip side though, this is a vitally important conversation to have before you get into bed with someone for the first time. It is critical that you know their sexual history. You need to know if they have been tested for STIs and if they have condoms with them. Be aware though, they are entitled to ask you about your methods of contraception and your past too. As mortifying as you might find it, it’s better to be safe than sorry ladies. The fear And not of the hangover variety. Will you enjoy it? Will he enjoy it? Often with a new partner, there’s that terrifying moment of worry that you won’t be able to do it, or maybe you won’t be any good at it if you do do it. Banish your worries and go with the flow - enjoy the moment. Body confident We may have mentioned it earlier, but in reality we can't stress it enough: you won’t enjoy sex unless you’re happy and feeling comfortable with yourself – regardless of his reaction. It’s time to get confident ladies – you look good so you need to feel it too, and you can find out more tips to overcome those insecurities here. As always, if you are having issues in the bedroom don't be afraid to book an appointment with your GP. Talking with your partner is the another key step to help figure out what's going on.