Colin Farrell has got an Abrakebabra black card, making him the luckiest man alive
The dream, he has achieved it.
There are few things in this life that are unequivocally and universally desired.
One is enough money to live a comfortable and happy existence. Another is job satisfaction. And the final is an Abrakebabra black card.
For the uncultured among us, a black card is a device which allows a person free food in a certain establishment for life.
It's the freedom to eat whatever you please without incurring a cost. It's the ability to chow down sans bank balance reduction. It's proof that you have, indeed, made it.
Essentially, it's the great occurrence to ever happen to another person and we're not jealous at all.
Black cards are, naturally, reserved for those among us who are special, deserving, and worthy of such an award.
It's no surprise then that Colin Farrell is in possession of one - an Abrakebabra one, to be specific.
The Lobster actor flaunted his card recently enough on Jimmy Kimmel Live, revealing that he is the only person in the entire word to be gifted the card.
“I had done an interview for this kebab shop in Aer Lingus magazine which is our national airline, and because they read my interview, they gave me the gold card," he said.
“But then, I came on the lovely Ellen Show and came on your lovely show and basically I took the f*cking thing international.
“So then I got a call that they had printed the black card, and no-one has a black card, the Pope doesn’t have one. So I could bring the Pope for a free kebab because that is what I can get.”
Or, you could bring me, Colin. Think about it.
Colin added that, despite his undeniable ability to feed himself handsomely at at any given time, he was only delighted when he got the card.
"I was so charmed," he said. "I can’t tell you how giddy I was when that came in the post.”