Lots of people enjoy vaginal penetrative sex.
However, many people do not enjoy vaginal penetrative sex, do not have vaginal penetrative sex, or cannot have vaginal penetrative sex.
Some of these people opt to have anal sex instead.
Some of them don’t and others might even be considering giving it a go.
So if you are considering trying anal sex for the first time, there are five things you should know.
1. Use lots and lots of lube
Like, lots.
Use a whole bottle if you want to (or don’t, because that stuff is expensive).
As we all know, the anus doesn’t lubricate itself due to arousal the same way the vagina does, so in order to enjoy safe and comfortable anal sex, lube is necessary.
Boots have a decent range in stock with prices starting from €6.99.
(Durex even do a ‘cheeky cherry’ version, if you’re any way that inclined.)
Brands like Durex and KY can be safely used with latex condoms though the lube, of course, must only be applied to the outside of the condom.
2. Go very slowly
If you’re trying anal sex for the first time, you need to go slow.
(And if you’re trying anal sex for the twentieth time, it probably wouldn’t hurt to go slow anyway).
The anus isn’t built to accommodate penises exactly the way the vagina is, so if you’re trying for the first time, it’d be a good idea to use a finger first.
If that all goes according to plan, you can then try a second finger.
If you’re comfortable enough with that, you can then try to insert the penis.
3. It can feel really, really good
Obviously. People wouldn’t be doing it if it didn’t.
While us women without prostates may not be able to have those prostates stimulated, that doesn’t mean that anal sex can’t be pleasurable for us too.
There are plenty of nerve endings up there that can absolutely be stimulated during this type of sex.
It’ll feel very different to vaginal penetration, but different can also be good.
4. Relax
We know, we know… if you’re not relaxed, somebody telling you to relax is probably the worst thing in the entire world.
This is even more true when it comes to sex.
Being anxious or nervous before sex is not a good thing – it can lead to discomfort, panic, and stress, usually meaning that the experience itself isn’t all that great.
However, to achieve anal sex it’s absolutely necessary to ensure that your body is relaxed.
Clenching could lead to difficulties achieving penetration, or even pain, so you need to make sure you’re entirely comfortable with the situation before you begin.
If you’re having trouble relaxing, changing position might help – being on top during anal sex gives you more control over what happens and when.
5. If it hurts, stop
This should go without saying, but often it doesn’t.
If anything hurts during any type of sex, you should stop, take a break and figure out where the pain is coming from.
The same, of course, goes for anal – after all, if sex doesn’t feel good then what’s the point in doing it?
You might notice some pressure when the penis first enters the anus (especially if this is the first time you’re trying), but if you’ve used enough lube, and you feel comfortable, this sensation shouldn’t last too long.
If any kind of pain continues during sex, stop.
Either apply more lube or stop altogether. You can always try again another time… or never again – it’s entirely up to you.
