We all have one or two first date memories that will stay with us for the rest of our lives. When we say ‘stay with’, we really mean haunt. There are a few things that are just not acceptable on the first date. The clumsy fall over, the dress ripping, the bad hair, that was all our fault. Everything else, that was his… Here are eleven of the major first date no-nos. Ladies, you might want to send this on to any potential suitors.
1. Oh, The Cinema.
What is the point on asking us out for a date to sit in darkness, not talking to each other. Seriously lads, seriously. 3D glasses do not look good on anyone. Also, we’re not going to let you see us at one of weakest moments… selecting pick’n’mix that will cost a days wages. That is third date material.
2. There Will Never Be A Lady and The Tramp Moment.
No man has yet mastered the art of eating spaghetti or noodles gracefully. We’re not that great at it ourselves but we do make an effort to use the fork and spoon method.
3. You Are Not Gordon Ramsay
We do not care how much your housemates loved your cooking in college, or how accurately you follow your mother’s recipes. Inviting us into your humble abode to watch you reenact master chef is not first date material.
4. Designated Dave
No one wants a designated driver. Why would any girl want to put themselves in a situation where their first date picks them up to take them out for a drink just to let them sit there and watch… There is simply no fun in that at all.
5. Designated Dave’s Ridiculously Drunk Brother.
Dave the driver doesn’t seem that bad after all.
6. The Babysitters Club
What age are we, 12?
7. His Thumbs Are Working
The texter. There is nothing quite as off-putting as spending an evening with a man that is glued to his phone the entire time.
8. Plate Licker
Oh the sauce was nice was it? Put. The. Plate. Down. Someone that has table manners equivalent to that of an alley cat is definitely not getting a second date.
9. Death Breath…
There is no excuse for bad breath. Simple as. A grown man that doesn’t engage in proper dental hygiene is an instant turn off. Doing something as simple as using CB12 oral rinse before bedtime and first thing in the morning will ensure to banish those awful odours for the next 12 hours. While there are only a few things you can be certain of on a first date, one aspect that you should definitely have under control is the smell of your breath. Always have a packet of CB12 Boost at the ready and ensure to chew on it before heading out to keep halitosis at bay (and secure an ol’ shift)… Let’s hope they see this in time.
10. What Do You Want To Do?
“I don’t mind, whatever you want to do”. “No, I’ll do whatever you want to do?” “I don’t know, what to you want to do?” Home. Just take us home.
11. Eager Beaver
The ‘thanks for a great night’ text after the first date is sweet. An essay documenting his strong feeling towards you, not so sweet. Next thing you know he’s cutting pieces of your hair off, saving your napkin at dinner and keeping the glass you had wine out of. Oh and then there is the “I’m never washing again”, in a bid not to lose your smell… Because that’s not creepy at all.
12. The Ex Factor
He didn’t just mention what we think he did, did he? Any man that monopolises the first date conversation with stories about his ex is instantly a goner. These First Date Deal Breakers were brought to you by CB12 and new CB12 Boost.
