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10th Nov 2018

Buckingham Palace’s response to Kate Middleton’s plasters is so gas

Jade Hayden

Lol?

Kate Middleton wears lots of things.

Some of those things are outfits from Zara. Some more of them are not cheap outfits from Zara. Some of them are somewhere in between cheap outfits from Zara and not cheap outfits from Zara.

And then some of them are plasters on her fingers because, you know, she’s probably cut herself.

Here’s a photo of Kate with a plaster on her hand meeting some lads.

And here she is with a plaster on her hand while in a museum.

And here she is with a plaster on her hand while wearing a nice dress.

See? Loads of them.

So, what is the reason behind Kate’s constant wearing of plasters, we hear you cry?

Could she be hiding something? Is there something she isn’t telling us? Are these plasters a cry for help, a signal that she is deeply unhappy in her role, a call for rescue, for safety, for release?

Or is she just really clumsy and keeps cutting herself?

Probably the latter, to be honest.

Anyway, a few years back, The Mirror went and decided to ask Buckingham Palace about the plasters because, you know, slow news day.

And their response was legit gas.

They said: “We have no comment on the plaster.”

Iconic.