The old JC.
It was a special time where we were led to believe that these essentially meaningless exams would determine the rest of our lives. To be fair, they’re really important. Not a day goes by where I’m not asked what I got in my CSPE exam (it was an A, please stop emailing me).
Junior Cert results night was a special evening for all involved. Nobody is content with a cup of tea and a slice of cake. It’s a big night with big plans, none of which Mam and Dad could ever be aware of.
Here’s 15 lies we told our parents in the lead up to the big night itself.
1. Me and the girls are just going to go for a quiet meal, should be home by 10pm.
2. We’ll probably just hang out in Siobhán’s for a while, think she’s got a new karaoke machine.
3. Yeah I’ll definitely keep my skirt below my knee, I don’t want to look like a hussy.
4. The fake ID is just to get a cheaper cinema ticket, I swear.
5. Nah I’m not going mad, I’ve school tomorrow sure.
6. Bowling and pizza, that’s the plan and we’ll be sticking to it.
7. Sarah’s Mam said she’d pick us up from the disco at 11pm, so if I’m late it’s her fault.
8. No there won’t be any boys. Sure I don’t even know any boys?
9. I’m bringing a big rucksack to carry some books back to the library, obviously.
10. Of course I’ll be putting on tights, sure I’ll freeze otherwise.
11. I’m telling you, it’s a teen disco, they won’t even have fizzy water.
12. It’s just a quiet sleepover at Mairéad’s, might get a Chinese then watch a film. Nothing crazy.
13. A tenner would be great, or twenty if you have it. Just for chips.
14. Obviously I’ve a vest under this. I’m not looking for pneumonia.
15. Mam, I’m 14, of course I’m going to be sensible.
