The world of rap and hip-hop music is difficult and often confusing.
Luckily, as a firm and respected member of the rap community, (see previous experience here), I have gained a lot of reliable insider knowledge and am willing to share it with the world.
Hence, I will dispel some rap myths.
‘Push It’ – Salt-N-Pepa
Pushing it ‘real good’ is unlikely to make any real difference compared to pushing it to the best of your God-given ability.
‘The Real Slim Shady’ – Eminem
Legally, his name is not Slim Shady, it is Marshall Bruce Mathers III and he’d do well to remember that.
‘Get Ur Freak On’ – Missy Elliott
It’s advisable that you request signed and dated permission from both parties involved before getting your ‘Freak On’.
’99 Problems’ – Jay Z
Counting your problems, no matter how sizeable they may be, will not reduce the amount of problems. Your time would be better spent trying to solve said problems.
‘Jesus Walks’ – Kanye West
Jesus didn’t walk, he glided.
‘No Diggity’ – Blackstreet Feat. Dr. Dre & Queen pen
Research has shown that, based on a large quantity being available at the time, there was a small trace of diggity present.
‘Lose Yourself’ – Eminem
It is literally impossible to get lost in music. Music is not a physical thing, it is not made up of matter.
‘Candy Shop’ – 50 Cent Feat. Olivia
It is an arrestable offence to lick or consume goods in a candy shop prior to paying for them.
‘Straight Outta Compton’ – N.W.A.
With the recent addition of strict traffic rules, successfully navigating your way straight out of Compton without any congestion is highly unlikely.
‘F**k Tha Police’ – N.W.A.
You should always be respectful towards the police.
‘Gangsta’s Paradise’ – Coolio Feat. L.V.
It’s completely unfeasible to spend a large portion of your life living in a gangster’s paradise. At some point you will need to come back to a gangster’s reality.
‘Ghetto Gospel’ – 2Pac
Please avoid hitting people at all times, especially with a ghetto gospel.