Why I wish my fiancé asked my parents for their blessing before proposing 4 years ago

Why I wish my fiancé asked my parents for their blessing before proposing

I have lived in Ireland for the better part of the last decade.

And despite my best efforts to get home as often as I can, it's still more than an 8 hour journey by plane (provided the stop over isn't totally awful).

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We had always been a close family, since it's just me, my mum and my dad. So missing out on the bigger (and even the simple, day-to-day) occasions can be tough.

That's why, when I envisioned getting engaged, I had always pictured my parents knowing about it first.

No, I don't mean in a 'asking for permission to marry me' sort of way.

Especially since I would have made my own decision on the proposal, no matter what they had said (and I'm fairly convinced they would have just laughed at the idea).

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A post shared by Keeley Ryan (@keeley_danielle) on

But if he had asked for the blessing of my mum and dad, or just given them a heads up that it was happening, it would have been able to bridge the 4,757km gap and include them in on one of the biggest moments of my life.

In the flurry of well wishes in the immediate aftermath of our engagement, there was always the niggling thought in the back of my mind that I wish my mum and dad had known.

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Having them so far away makes some of the bigger moments in life harder, especially the it is something particularly emotional.

A post shared by Keeley Ryan (@keeley_danielle) on

I rang them almost immediately after Sam proposed. As in, less than 5 minutes afterwards.

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I wanted nothing more than to share that moment with them; to feel like they were there celebrating with us rather than so many miles away.

And it's really, really, really hard to have that kind of celebration over WhatsApp.

Sam ultimately didn’t end up giving them a heads up about the proposal - mostly because he was convinced I had said I didn’t want that.

A post shared by Keeley Ryan (@keeley_danielle) on

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But I'm pretty sure it's for the best.

If he had given them a heads up about the proposal, my dad would have definitely told my mum - or, if it had been my mum who had found out first, vice-versa.

And, even though they both protest otherwise, I'm positive they would have told me ahead of time.


Keeley and Sam are saying 'I do,' in May 2019. And with a year to go, this bride-to-be admits she's still learning the ropes. In the run-up to her Big Day, Keeley will be writing a weekly blog about all things wedding-related... from the start of planning, to walking down the aisle.