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2nd February 2024
05:46pm GMT
Sure they can't take you out for dinner or physically touch you there are so many reasons why men on paper are just better than those in practice.
If you're trying to mentally list off reasons why I'm wrong I can stop you with one name, Mr Darcy.
Yet if that's not enough to convince you, just keep reading and I'll have you nodding in agreement before you've finished the article.
They’re fictional. How can they? They simply hang around in the pages of the novel, eagerly awaiting the next time you decide to turn a page.
They don’t get up and, I don’t know, go find someone else because you’re taking too long to get back at them.
The only way they’ll break your heart is if the author kills them off but shhh.
Probably the hardest part of a lot of relationships is trying to get back to someone especially when you're up to your eyes in work.
The man on the page doesn't even own a real phone, he's not going to be sitting around waiting for your reply, you can just pick up the book and continue where you left off when you're ready.
It’s been scientifically proven that reading significantly reduces stress levels.
Has it ever been scientifically proven that dating a guy you met on Tinder reduces stress levels? Nope. I would argue that if we ran an experiment it would be quite the opposite.
If you struggle with commitment, it won't be cheating if you just happen to pick up another book and fall for another made-up man.
There are so many good fictional boyfriends out there why should you just stick to one?
Are you more of a homebody? Does the idea of sitting in a hot, loud restaurant turn you off your food?
Guys in books won't take you out, you don't even have to get dressed.
Sure the dates in your head, nothing more than vivid hallucinations playing out in your mind while you read…but still.
As Hannah Montanna said, "nobody's perfect," but fictional men are pretty damn close.
A lot of them are literally written by women for women so they know exactly what you want without any fuss.
Even if they do have flaws they're usually really endearing too!
You can have the full duvet if you want, there's no fighting over who does the dishes and probably the best one, no one is there to steal food from your plate.
