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Celebrity

02nd Dec 2021

6 things we learned from Billie Eilish’s fifth same interview with Vanity Fair

Katy Brennan

Time flies.

Billie Eilish has sat down with Vanity Fair for her fifth annual interview. And while the questions remain the same, the popstar’s answers have definitely changed.

Billie was just 15 years old when the tradition began back in 2017, with a mere 257,000 Instagram followers, versus her current count of 94.1 million.

In the new interview, 19-year-old Billie seems to have embraced her true self – she’s honest about her feelings, what she wants for her future, and who she’s become.

Here are 6 things we learned about the singer this year.

1. She’s grown massively

Billie has truly grown since her first meeting with the magazine in 2017. Admitting that she once dreaded getting older and the idea of “growing up”, she now finds she is really enjoying it.

“I’m starting to have like an adulthood which is new for me and very exciting,” she said. “And I have had new experiences and new people and lots of love.”

2. She’s a little cringed out by her old self 

Watching some of her old responses back, the star couldn’t help but laugh.

“Gosh, that girl was going through an identity crisis,” she said “Oh my gosh! You can see it in my eyes. I mean, really. The low bun? Please. What’s going on?”

In the old clips, Billie felt she was too focused on giving off a cool, confident vibe – and, in turn, ended up hiding her true feelings. She now admits she often lied.

“It’s just not what I was actually thinking,” she said. “I was thinking like: ‘I’m overwhelmed. I hate this. Everyone expects something from me. I don’t have anything to give them. I f**kin suck.'”

3. She feels a lot of pressure nowadays

This year, Billie opened up about how it really feels to have the world’s eyes on you at all times and the expectations that come with that. Whereas, in the past, she tried to brush it off and act as if she didn’t care.

“I feel a lot of pressure. But I would also say, like, back then…I was pretty overall  loved, I would say. To be honest. So I was, like, scared ’cause I really wanted to keep that love. And now, like, tons of people hate me.

“So I’m not worried anymore. I’m like, ‘Oh, OK well, if you like me, you like me; if you don’t, you don’t.”

4.  She’s learning to live in the moment

Watching her 2020 self complain about the pandemic cancelling live music, Billie said she has since learned to appreciate what she has rather than what she lacks. In hindsight, she can now see a lot of great things happened last year, even if she couldn’t see it then.

“I feel like everything is permanent all the time. And it’s not, things go in waves, things happen, things stop and then they start and it’s like… You just have no idea what’s to come, ever. You have to try to be aware of the amazing things that are going on right in the moment and not later.”

5. She’s started going out in public again

In the past, the singer felt like going out in public was a “disaster”. She didn’t want the world to see her as her every-day self, as opposed to the global phenomenon they expect. Going out meant hiding behind sunglasses, hats, hoods, and layers of clothes.

“My attitude used to be like, ‘I can’t go out, I can’t go here, I can’t go there.’… I wasn’t able to go to a park or go get coffee. It freaked me out.”

But in the last year, she has opened up to it and now feels confident stepping outside – something she is truly grateful for.

6. Performing makes her feel invincible 

When asked what makes her feel powerful, Billie instantly replied:

“Being on stage makes me feel incredibly powerful. There’s a part in my show where I get on a lift that takes me over the crowd and I lean over the edge and look down. And that is a kind of power that no one should feel. It makes me feel literally invincible.”

Watch the full interview below.