Share
13th May 2018
06:00am BST
Where are all my things?
What is on my face? Is that BLOOD? Nope. It's ketchup.
Who did I text?
Worse... who did I call?
If I turn off my phone I won't know and I can ignore it.
Does everyone hate me? I feel like everyone hates me.
Food might fix me.
Food might kill me.
Worth a shot though.
WRONG. SEND AN AMBULANCE.
There's only one thing for it - a Netflix marathon.
My couch still loves me.
Text from unknown number. Dear God this can't be good.
Well, it's friendly... so that's a good start.
Flashback! Did I get the shift last night? I remember a dance-off but...
I'll call the girls and we can compare notes.
I have a pain in my face. From laughing.
No one hates me. I know this, but it doesn't make The Fear any less real.
Never again.
Until next time.
Explore more on these topics:
Top Story
Everyone wanted this toy for Christmas in the 1990s This article contains affiliate links. We may earn a commission on any sales generated from it. The countdown to Christmas is well and truly underway, and we’re in the midst of shopping for our nearest and dearest. However, shopping for our little ones has proven more […]
4 days ago
Everyone wanted this toy for Christmas in the 1990s This article contains affiliate links. We may earn a commission on any sales generated from it. The countdown to Christmas is well and truly underway, and we’re in the midst of shopping for our nearest and dearest. However, shopping for our little ones has proven more […]
Life
4 days ago
An expert has spoken out Relationships are a crucial part of humanity, but they’re notoriously tricky. From arguing over who’s turn it is to do the dishes to figuring out who’s going to do the bins, there’s lots of things that can go wrong – and that’s before we even get onto the deep stuff. […]
Life
4 days ago
This children’s tablet is one of the best sellers This article contains affiliate links. We may earn a commission on any sales generated from it. If you’re still on the lookout for a Christmas gift for your child, then we’ve got you sorted with an offer you simply can’t refuse. All our little ones want […]
Life
4 days ago
‘I also notice a difference with the warmth of the room’ This article contains affiliate links. We may earn a commission on any sales generated from it. The colder, winter months often make it challenging to dry clothes quickly, so a ‘game changer’ heated airer is the perfect addition to combat the issue. This Oypla […]
Life
6 days ago
Behind on your Christmas shopping? This toy needs to be on your list The countdown to Christmas is well and truly underway, and we cannot wait to exchange gifts on the 25th. If you’ve not yet purchased any presents, then don’t worry, you still have plenty of time. One item at the top of many […]
Life
1 week ago
This instant camera is a perfect Christmas gift This article contains affiliate links. We may earn a commission on any sales generated from it. If you’ve got pre-teens or teenagers at home and are lost about what to buy them for Christmas, then we’ve got you covered. This sweet instant camera is on sale for […]
Life
1 week ago
Most popular names for babies born in December revealed
Life
1 week ago
The adorable name is perfect for baby girls born in December
Life
2 weeks ago
