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Life

31st Jul 2018

7 key reasons why we should all be masturbating every day

Jade Hayden

Shift Happens

Time to come to your senses.

It’s National Orgasm Day today – and you know what that means!

We’ll be sitting around our gaffs alone for the evening not getting any just like every other night of the year… sounds about right, yeah.

Being forever alone doesn’t really matter that much at all though (in this instance) because the only person you need to have a sneaky once-a-day masturbatory session is yourself.

And you should be too. Masturbation isn’t just a way to kill time when you’re bored or don’t have anything to do or are weeping silently due to the realisation that nobody will ever be good enough for you.

Nah, masturbation is great for a lot of reasons – this is them.

1. You’ll live far longer than all the people who ever wronged you

The ultimate revenge.

And it’s fairly likely that if you’re a fan of orgasming a lot, you will live a whole lot longer than those who aren’t.

One study from Wales showed that men who had regular orgasms (about two a week) died from heart attacks at half the rate compared to those who didn’t.

A study as in-depth as this hasn’t been carried out using just female subjects, but back in the 1940s, a two decade long project showed that women who reported being sexually fulfilled thanks to orgasms did tend to live longer than those who said they had bad sex lives.

Seems legit to us, yeah.

2. Orgasms reduce stress 

Orgasms naturally lower your cortisol levels and release a load of oxytocin while they’re at it – essentially meaning that you’re getting a burst of hormones that are bound to make you feel super chilled and happy.

Cortisol is a nasty lad linked to a lot of different things like weight gain and high blood pressure, but it’s probably most well known for inciting stress.

High levels of cortisol can lead to anxiety, depression, and even a shorter life expectancy so honestly, keeping those levels down should absolutely be on all of our agendas. Via masturbation.

Just make sure you’ll actually be able to finish if you start… the last thing you want to do is add more fuel to the fire because, as we all know, there is nothing more frustrating in the entire world than setting out to give yourself an orgasm and not quite getting there.

It’s painful, it’s upsetting, it’s borderline offensive – and we all deserve better.

3. Time to sleep like a (sexually satisfied adult) baby 

If you’ve ever been desperately struggling to fall asleep to the point of anguish, you’ll probably be more than well aware of the power of the orgasm to send you right off like a light.

All the hormones released when you come are enough to make you feel fairly great… but they’re also bound to make you feel fairly wrecked.

Stunning.

 

4. And boost creativity

No really, it’s true.

According to an article by Ravishly referenced by Metro.co.uk, it would actually be a good idea for us to all be taking masturbation breaks in work.

Think cigarette breaks but with less smoking and more stroking.

It’s already common knowledge that office workers are far more productive on the job when they get to take regular short breaks from sitting at a desk all day.

Just imagine how productive we’d be if we could totally distract ourselves from spreadsheets and Google Hangouts for a quick 10 minutes of unabridged pleasure.

You’d get loads done.

5. The orgasm gap needs to be closed 

When it comes to straight men and straight women, there is one glaring difference between the two that we shouldn’t ignore – the amount of orgasms they’re having.

On average, three out of four women report not being able to orgasm every time they have sex. As well as this, 20 percent say they’ve never orgasmed, compared to the two percent of men who say the same.

There are a lot of reasons for this disparity – everything from men thinking penetration is a foolproof way to make someone come to women being unable to relax during sex is enough to make achieving orgasm far more difficult.

And although the orgasm gap might focus primarily on sex between two people, that doesn’t mean we can’t get a head start ourselves and knock a few out to bring up the numbers.

6. Masturbation is empowering 

Have a bad day at work? You’ll feel better after you orgasm.

Some lad ghosting you? You’ll feel better after you masturbate specifically not about him.

Not into your look lately? Don’t feel sexy, hot, attractive, glorious, or all of the other things that you definitely are? You’ll feel better after you make yourself feel better. Literally.

Being able to make yourself feel good is probably one of the most under-acknowledged talent that most of us possess. Taking advantage of ourselves is underrated, and it shouldn’t be.

7. It feels nice 

Should be enough of a reason in itself, tbh.