9 Things Every Irish Mammy Says On November 1st

With all the excitement of the Bank Holiday weekend and dressing up as all types of things altogether for Halloween now firmly behind us, we woke up this morning to some absolute gems from our mammy dearest.

Sure there’s a reason they say she’s one in a million!

__________________________________________________

I didn’t sleep a wink last night

Your poor mammy is looking worn and tired on this, November 1^st. And why pray tell? Because of all the ‘young ones’ letting off bangers and the like ‘til all hours of the night. Poor mammy.

Jesus, it’s like winter out there…

Ermm… yes, mam, you’re right. It is like winter out there. Maybe because it is winter? Just a thought.

You really notice the dark evenings now

Again mammy, the evenings have been getting darker for some time now. However, the clocks did go back last weekend, so at least the mornings are a bit brighter, right?

Never mind the mornings…

It’s the evenings. I don’t mind getting up in the dark, but coming home in the dark too? Sure you never see daylight at all. No, no they need to sort those clocks out so that we can all come home in daylight. Hmm… not sure if that’s possible, but we’ll ask Enda Kenny to see what he can do.

We’ll never stick the cold

No, we really won’t. Especially if you keep refusing to turn on the heating until 7pm. Seriously… It’s feckin’ freezing mammy!

Sure we didn’t get a summer at all

Now this is one we can completely agree with. There was no sun, there was no lazy days at the beach (or the lake if you are from the midlands). It was all just dull, dreary and well… pretty darn depressing. And now it’s winter. Great.

We won’t find it until Christmas is here

Another fair point, well made. To be precise, as of November 1^st, there are approximately 53 days until Santa arrives. Can we get a ‘woohoo’?

We’d better start getting the presents

Hmm. We do have 53 days mammy why would we start being super-organized? Oh that’s right, sure won’t the shops be ‘bedlam’ in the run-up to Christmas. We couldn’t be having that at all, at all.

Don’t forget to say your prayers…

Your mammy will have more than likely reminded you that today is All Saints’ Day. She may have even roused you out of bed at some ungodly hour to get you to early Mass (to miss the traffic, you know).

Honorary mention:

“God, how is it November 1st already? Isn’t time flying? Where did that year go at all, at all.”

We don’t know mammy, we really don’t know.