Not one to read on the beach with an umbrella-adorned cocktail - but definitely worthwhile. The Sex Lives of Siamese Twins is the latest offering from Trainspotting author Irvine Welsh, and it is just as gritty, raw and dark as you might expect from the Scottish novelist. Although it is full of Welsh's signature characters - low-lifes and foul-mouthed addicts), Irvine has turned his attention away from substance abuse and towards the fitness fanaticism of LA. The character's addictions are not drink and drugs - but fitness, food and celebrity. The protagonist, Lucy Brennan, is an aggressive personal trainer who is thrown into the media spotlight when she successfully disarms a would-be gunman in Miami. The one witness to the event, Lena Sorenson, is Lucy's polar opposite - overweight, depressed and vulnerable. Her obsession with Lucy grows and seems to set up the framework for the narrative, but as the story develops some very interesting subversions occur - things are not all they seem. The characters are vibrant and darkly realistic. Taking on a female voice is a brave move for any male author but Lucy's voice is real and believable. He gets it. While she can be very hard to like, her layers bring her to life. She is flawed and imperfect and makes decisions that will have you screaming at the book - but one thing is for sure, you will be engaged. The narrative is haunted by the image of siamese twins, whose own story is being played out on the news throughout the story. Their story mirrors the main plot perfectly and creates the perfect amount of unease and discomfort in the reader. The story sprawls a little - with peaks and dips that feel like exciting drink/food binges followed by painful, dark hangovers and illness. The plot will be quickly forgotten, like the details of a strange nightmare, but the characters will stay with you like the lingering unease of the bad dream.