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Entertainment

28th Aug 2020

7 thoughts I had while bingeing Selling Sunset for the first time

Jade Hayden

Location, Location, Location this is not. 

Selling Sunset is a genius TV show.

It’s got everything the easily distracted millennial female Netflix user needs from an easy-to-consume programme: property porn, nice outfits, and a load of fucking drama.

Following the release of the eagerly anticipated third season of the realtor reality show, I decided to take a few days off engaging with Good Content™ and dive into the chaotic, entertaining, and deeply stressful world of the Oppenheim Group.

What I was expecting was carnage. What I was not expecting was to have a genuine new favourite TV show.

Here’s 7 thoughts I had during the entire process (no spoilers, kind of).

1. Chrishell is an angel and she deserves better

Everybody loves an underdog and Chrishell Hartley is just that.

Coming from poverty (she was the, ahem, “smelly kid”), Chrishell is out here living her realtor dream in the Hollywood Hills.

She’s different because she has an accent. She’s memorable because she has a light behind her eyes. She’s the best cast member because she gets drunk and does silly things but is never actively nasty.

Chrishell is an angel, a breath of fresh air, and she is carrying this show (alongside Christine who is a total icon but utterly terrifying).

2. These houses are incredible! 

Woah, a house worth $4 million! Woah, a house worth $10 million! Woah, a house worth $40 million that hasn’t even been built yet!!

Look at the infinity pool! Look at the drive way! Look at the eight bathrooms, six bedrooms, and walk in closet! This is unlike anything I have seen before!

3. These houses all look the same!

Honestly lads, once you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.

The houses are incredible, yes. They are expensive, yes. It is very impressive that these women possess the skills to sell them and bank themselves a stellar commission, yes. But they’re all the same.

They all have exposed beams. They all have an infinity pool. They all have an incredible view and if they don’t then why are they even on the market?

The concept of a nice home has lost all meaning. They’re all amazing. More of the drama, please.

4. Romain is so out of his depth 

Poor Romain. Or poor Mary. I honestly can’t decide.

Romain, a handsome French guy whose English is fine, is dating Mary. Their relationship is pretty much grand apart from the fact that Romain doesn’t really want kids for about 10 years and Mary is pushing 40 (she looks great though, fair play).

He also couldn’t give two fucks about wedding planning, doesn’t really have a lot to say at the best of times, and has started a brawl with fellow realtor Davina who, in fairness, deserves it.

The man just wants a simple life, and when his significant other is shooting a Netflix reality show half the time, chances are he’s not about to get that.

5. Wait, did Mary and Jason used to date?!  

Huh, could have fooled me. She never mentions it.

Mary and Jason used to date. In fact, they were pretty serious because Mary dumped him for being emotionally unavailable. They now remain good friends, which is a pretty good scenario because they work together.

The above situation is not one that audiences will readily be able to pick up on because it is rarely mentioned. Mary is private about her previously relationship with Jason. She never brings up the fact that he is, in fact, her ex.

Never.

6. Who is the motorbike for and why does it appear in every single shot? 

I get it, lads. Jason and Brett Oppenheim are cool guys. They’re bachelors. They buzz around The Hills in cool cars and park their singular motorbike in the the window of their office.

But why? Who is this for? When did this become a thing? Am I supposed to be impressed?

Because,  I am.

7. Does Sherry Fitzgerald have these same issues? 

I can only presume so.