Everyone knows that in a paid by monthly cycle, your first week you’re a queen, the second a princess and by week three… well it’s not pretty. We all know that money apparently makes the world go ‘round, but sometimes we can’t help but feel our social life come to a standstill the week before pay-day. You may recognise some of these signs… Find the perfect outfit You trailed the shops, peered through every window and tried on a thousand heels with no luck. The perfect outfit was an elusive dream. Now that you’re more likely to find feathers than notes in your bank account, the ultimate dress is staring at you from across the room. Life isn’t fair. You’ve A New Diet… And it involves noodles, toast and beans. You’ve a new appreciation for the microwave and meals take 2 minutes to heat. Meat? Pah, that’s a luxury that can wait ‘til next week. The Party of the Year… Just so happens to be falling on the weekend before pay day. You can’t miss out, but you can’t afford to go either. Why must your bank account take priority over a social life? Which usually leads to you… ... drinking the most vile alcohol in your sitting room with the plan to cut costs of drinks in the club. It was brought back from a trip where you lost your dignity and now it's got a second chance to shine. Your stomach is not made of iron. Yes, you were just a little sick in your mouth. No, it didn’t make a dent in your spending spree. Get Clamped You thought you’d save yourself the bus fare. Sure a short trek to and from the shops isn’t that bad. You didn’t realise you parked in a loading bay and now you’ve been clamped. Goodbye €80. We had such high hopes for you. The Bills Apocalypse You’re short on cash? That’s the week every bill imaginable comes through the letterbox. ESB, TV, car insurance. Forget the children, won’t somebody please think of the trees?! We might just huddle and cry thank you very much. Tickets Go On Sale For Your Favourite Band You can almost guarantee Ticketmaster wait for the minute you’ve hit your overdraft to announce *insert band name here* are playing an Irish gig. We’re reasonable people though. We clearly get a loan and swear to pay it back the following week. Desperate times… Birthday/ Anniversaries/ Special Occasions Long gone are the days where a homemade card cut it. Now you’re faced with a disappointed face AND the guilt of being the worst sister/ best friend/ daughter/ girlfriend ever. Maybe if you can just put off seeing them for a few more days… Hold A Not-So-Secret Grudge Against Those Already In The Money You’re counting down the hours, minutes and seconds until you can use your card without it bursting into flames. Then you head around to a friend’s for a cuppa and she’s showing you the new jeans she picked up. She got paid last week. Yes, you hate her. Just a little. (It’s TOTALLY acceptable). Swear You’re Going To Change Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away… now I’ve hit the shops since pay day, oh I believe in yesterday. Yes, you’ll make the budget, no you won’t stick to it and yes, you will be back on the tins of beans in three weeks times. In fairness though, how amazing are those new shoes!?! VICTORY DANCE!