All You Need to Know: Forget Female Relationship Rules, Men Are Now Jumping On The Bandwagon

We all know that when it comes to relationships, you need to have a fairly decent sense of humour in order to get by and to be honest? We couldn’t help but laugh when Her.ie reader Catherine Theresa alerted us to a certain webpage.

Earlier this month we shared an email with you that was sent to one of our readers by her (hilarious) boyfriend. Her boyfriend figured it was about time that he set the record straight and offered her some “rules” about relationships from male perspective. If you missed it, you can read it here. It’s worth a gander, we promise!

Well, it seems as though these “male rules” are having something of a moment right now, because a bunch of them are after springing up online. Specifically on a webpage, probably created by some angry men who want to get these relationship rules out into the public realm.

In the spirit of giving you a bit of a laugh on this miserable Friday morning, we figured we’d share our favourite man-rules from the webpage (and some of our own tongue-in-cheek replies to these rules)…

10. He says: “Sometimes we just don’t want to talk. Don’t take it personally.” We say:“Sometimes we just don’t want to have sex. Don’t take it personally.”

9. He says: “We would not wear high heels to impress you.” We say: “Honey, we wear high heels to give us a killer pair of legs, it’s got nothing to do with you!”

8. He says: “Breathe occasionally so we can get a word in.” We say: “Listen occasionally and we won’t have to keep repeating ourselves.”

7. He says: “If you ask us, ‘Do you think she’s prettier than me?’ we might just say yes. Then what are you going to do?” We say: “Eh… dump you?”

6. He says: “We need to vegetate.” We say: “Perfectly understandable. But remember – when you’re vegetating on the sofa we don’t make smart comments about the fact that you look like an absolute state. Please return the favour.”

5. He says: “Sunday equals sports. Period.” We say: “Fine, Saturday equals non-stop reality television.”

4. He says: “Crying is blackmail.” We say: “We know, that’s why we do it (oh, and it works!)”

3. He says: “No, we don’t know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar you know we check.” We say: “Oh, it’s your birthday? I didn’t buy you anything because you didn’t write it down on that random calendar I check occasionally.”

2. He says: “It’s not that we don’t want to make you happy, it’s just that sometimes, we don’t know how.” We say: “As long as you try, we don’t mind. But if you really want to make us happy, a new pair of Louboutins are a sure-fire way to get us in a good mood.”

1. He says: “We notice other women because we are men and we are alive.” We say: “Then you have no right getting mad when you catch us having a sneaky peek at another man!”