While it’s always nice to hear those three little words of comfort, apparently ‘I love you’ comes second to another important phrase touted by couples in a supported, caring relationship.
When we think of some of the most important moments where we turn to a partner, there’s always going to be the ups and the downs. Whether you’ve bagged that promotion, made the 5K or are stressing out with a work project, emotional support comes part and parcel of any healthy and happy relationship.
Now one relationship expert suggests we start asking a pretty practical question the next time there’s an upset in the relationship:
“How can I help?”
The question could prove more effective than any professions of love, with New York based psychologist Jane Greer attributing the simple act of kindness has more emotional value to a partner than those three magic words.
Supporting the argument to take the hands-on approach to conflict rather than offer up the phrase of love, Greer says:
“A lot of times, we will look to help by offering advice, which typically is the last thing someone wants to hear or will find helpful.
“”How can I help?” conveys five important things: You’re tuned in to your partner, aware of what they’re going through, considering their feelings and needs, empathetic to their situation, and looking to help out on a supportive, concrete level.”
So next time your other half is having a rough day, offering up some practical help might be more beneficial to your relationship in the long-run.
