How much is too much when it comes to your engagement ring?

The rule of spending three months' salary on an engagement ring was popular once upon a time, but are people still following that rule?

Her.ie readers and experts opened up about the pressure to spend thousands on a ring, the importance of not letting societal standards influence you, and the love behind proposing.

What the experts say when it comes to engagement rings

Where did the three-month salary myth come from? According to Cabochon Diamonds, it was a clever marketing tool created by a diamond supplied many years ago.

"That was simply great advertising from a diamond supplier many years ago."

The idea of spending thousands on an engagement ring seems pretty bizarre now when most couples are focusing on buying their first home together.

The team said, "Most savvy couples are investing in their homes and not spending ridiculous money on engagement rings.

"Moissinate, lab diamonds, and simulants are all extremely popular these days. More stone for your cash and more cash to invest in your property or on making memories while traveling."

What the Her.ie readers say

Unsurprisingly, many readers agreed that spending three months' wages, the thought honestly makes me queasy, on a ring is just not possible anymore. Between the cost of living and the housing crisis, splashing out on a ring just isn't an option for most people.

One woman stressed that it isn't really about the ring, but the person proposing.

"I think it comes down to a person's individual values and aesthetics. Personally, I'm a simple and practical person. My first husband bought me a ring that cost more than my car at the time. He cheated and we divorced in a couple of years. My current husband proposed with a glittery piece of wire and we've been together 20 years and bought a house before we married, instead of spending lavishly on rings and a posh wedding. He's one in a million and I wouldn't trade him for a billionaire."

Many agree that it's all down to the individual couple, but you shouldn't let societal pressures influence how much you spend. Does it really matter if you're spending €10k or €1k on a ring?

"It's up to you as a couple to decide no one else's decision. Go with what you're both happy with," one said.

Another added: "An engagement ring is not how much you spend but the love that's behind it…. You could spend thousands and not have real love or something reasonable with meaning. Spend what you can afford."

"3 months' salary is too much. If you love each other, rings are insignificant," another reader said.

One thing many suggested was getting a lab-grown diamond rather than a real one because it is ethical and a fraction of the cost.

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