Nudie Beaches, Yay or Nay? Would You Dare To Bare?!

Michelle Says: Nay

Once, I wandered lonely… on to a nudie beach.

There's a sentence that started off like a poem might, and ended like a horror movie well could.

On holiday in the Canaries, and suffering a sore head from the actions of night before, I decided to clear my noggin and amble along the beaches as far as my little legs would carry me.

Off I went, passing out throngs of fellow tourists, leaving splashing and screaming in my wake, as the sands became less crowded and the town was a spot in the distance behind me.

On and on I trekked towards some incredible sand dunes. Stopping to let myself soak in the beauty around me, I looked towards the shore. And there, at waters edge, stood a man who I would guess to be in his late sixties. Mahogany coloured, looking back towards the beach, his shock of white hair stood out against the brilliant blue. So much so that it took me a second to notice what else stood out… the lack of any scrap of clothing whatsoever.

I turned as though I had been burned and marched along indignantly, thinking he should be reported, this was a family destination for heaven’s sake. ‘There are CHILDREN here!’ But in this part of the beach, there was not. Sure enough, I had happened upon nudie territory.

Ass cheeks as red as my face all around. Saggy boobs were flapping free and private parts were on public show. I cut from the beach up to the road as quickly as I could and stayed firmly to ‘my’ part of the beach for the rest of the week.

Would I intentionally visit a nudist beach, sans clothing? Not on your nelly. There’s a small part of me that envies the freedom nudists must feel in just not giving a damn, granted. But, for me, the only people who should be able to see what goes on beneath the bikini bottoms are yourself, Himself, and your gynecologist. That’s my metaphorical line in the sand, and why I’ll be very careful to watch out for any real lines in the sand the next time I’m tempted to stroll in the sun…

Amy: Yay

On holiday, you can’t walk onto a beach without seeing someone’s bits. Fact. Whether you’re in Spain, Crete or America, chances are your vision will be assaulted by someone’s boobs or bum. It’s a traditional part of the typical summer holiday. 

Would I de-pant myself on a nudie beach? Well if everyone else is getting naked, what’s the harm in it? Women constantly walk around public beaches with their tops off, so why is getting naked on a private beach considered to be so shocking?

We’re always told that God made each of us in his own image. Unfortunately this image didn’t include clothes. The human body is nothing to be ashamed of.

We live in a society that is so fuelled by insecurity and feeling upset with what you’ve been given - maybe the nudists have the right idea. Maybe getting naked and frolicking in the waves every now and then would do us all the world of good. 

I admire the sheer self-confidence and self-acceptance that nudie beach frequenters have. It takes a lot of guts to be able to strip your clothes off in public and not care what other people think about you.

Plus getting naked on the beach actually has a host of benefits. Not only will it help you to improve your own relationship with yourself, it can boost your confidence, give you a sense of freedom and you might even get a tan from it.

You’d be getting some extra Vitamin D, which is essential for strong and healthy bones. Oh, and just think of all the money you’d save on towels and swimming togs. Awesome, right?

So where’s the problem? 

We spend so much of our lives hiding ourselves and locked away in cities and towns. Maybe it’s time we all stripped down to our birthday suit and reconnected with Mother Earth and ourselves. 

I say yay to the nudie beach – as long as you keep your gaze from the neck upwards, you’ll be grand and who knows? Maybe you’ll even enjoy yourself too.