In this weekly feature, Her.ie goes behind enemy lines to see what it’s really like to be single in Ireland.
From speed dating to making speedy escapes, our no-holds-barred blog will follow our attempts to venture into the dating jungle, play the field and share any wisdom that we finds along the way.
Week Twenty Seven: Silence Ain’t Golden
There’s nothing like the feeling before a date. The excitement, the anticipation, the planning… half of the fun of dating comes before you’ve even met the person. And in some cases, it’s just as well.
I was lazing on the couch the other night when, bored by what Tinder had to offer, my flatmate got to wondering about some of the ‘ones that got away’. As we discussed some of our short-lived romantic endeavours, her thoughts went to a fella she had enjoyed a one night stand with a while back.
While the bedroom action was perfectly satisfactory and they’d had a laugh the following day, neither had followed up on it but now that things were a bit quieter on the man scene, she decided that another taste of yesterday’s sausage may not be a bad thing.
Half driven by the prospect of a bit of rough and tumble without the hassle of heading into town for a date (the gentleman in question lived down the road) and in need of a giggle on a boring Monday, she dropped him a light-hearted text and waited for his reply.
What started with a bit of banter evolved into a good chat so the pair decided to meet up for a drink the following night after her paramour had finished GAA training.
The following day, she decided to throw caution to the wind and spent her last €10 on a pair of fancy knickers in anticipation of the night ahead.
With Andy* having said that he should be done by 10.30pm, she hopped into the shower around 9pm and began to get ready. Halfway through her preparations, it briefly occurred to her that she hadn’t heard from him all day but put it down to their busy schedules.
By 10pm, however, she was getting a little worried.
By 10.15pm… she poured herself a drink.
By 10.30pm… there was still no word and the screen of her phone was threatening to crack under her stare.
By 10.45pm… she had compulsively checked his Whatsapp so many times that she was getting repetitive strain injury.
By 11pm… she was angry… very angry and sent a message to his phone saying ‘What’s the story?’
By 11.30pm… she had realised that she’d been stood up, so she finished another drink, took to Tinder to console herself and sworn a curse on Andy and all belonging to him.
Before she headed to work the following morning at 7.30am, she took another sneaky look at WhatsApp and saw that he had been online that morning so decided to put him on the ‘complete and utter arsehole’ pile and move on with her life.
A few hours later, she received this text.
So ladies, we have a woman in need of advice. Should she believe his story and give him another chance or cut her losses and look further afield? Do you have an even worse dating horror story to make her feel better?
Let us know your thoughts on Twitter @herdotie with the #shiftyfirstdates or email us at [email protected]!
