We know that America is capable of making anything a huge, over-glorified product (see: Justin Bieber) but here’s one more thing you absolutely, definitely, need.
If you’re lucky enough to not know what the dull-witted term means, the Walk of Shame is the walk the happens after a long night of drinking and not making it to your own bed at the end of it. Now there’s a solution for that!
They’re calling it the Walk of ShameTM kit. Complete with a one-size-fits-most dress, flip flops (because “you can’t run away fast enough in the heels from last night”), “red eye hiding” sunglasses, pre-pasted toothbrush (“you may not remember where your mouth has been”), a backpack for your quick escape, an awareness bracelet (for breast cancer, not casual sex) and our favourite part: ‘Call/Don’t Call’ leave behind note cards, so he knows what your name and number is when he wakes up after you’ve just picked up and left pretending to be some secret agent.
If this isn’t ridiculous enough, the whole kit is €25 or as much as a long cab ride would cost.
We don’t know why they went through all the trouble when we all know the real solution came from the writers of 30 Rock: It’s not the Walk Of Shame, it’s the Stride of Pride.
