WANTED: A Fake Family So This Man Can Earn More Money

One man has a genius plan to earn more money from his workplace – inventing a fake family to increase his salary offer. The Cleveland candidate decided to post an ad to Craigslist, because he believes men with families get offered more money. In the ad, the man claims to be a college student returning to school “after a several year absence” to finish his degree. Two things have become quite clear to me: The business world will do everything in it's power to pay young professionals entering the working world as little as possible, and people are always a sucker for cute kids. I have personally witnessed many cases of favoritism towards married employees or employees with children, the idea being that they have more of an incentive to be a devoted worker then others might and are therefore deserving of a better wage regardless of actual performance. The internet has loosely confirmed this. I have even witnessed a hiring manager become furious upon hearing the starting wage of a young man recently hired into a company claiming that "Single people don't need that much money", which got me thinking. This is where you and your kids come in.

So what’s his plan?

The man has carefully placed an ad looking for a woman and her kids to pose as his family over the next few YEARS. As well as family outings and fake birthday parties, he plans to take lots of photos so he can have an active family on social media. His theory means that when companies do their usual background stalk, they'll see that he has a family and offer him a higher salary.

Approximately six months before I formally begin searching for a job, I will post approximately 12-24 photos of my "family" and my "life", meshed together to create an entirely phony yet truly believable picture of myself. If everything goes as planned, whatever branch of whatever organization that looks into my background pending being hired for my first real job will be inevitably perusing my Facebook page and more and will come to the conclusion that I am deserving of a "Family Man" level of compensation. If the secret gets out that I live alone, have no children, and spend the majority of my disposable income on restoring vintage cars I could find myself in a vastly different income bracket since it will be perceived that I can get by on less- MUCH less. This will not stand. This is how these people think supposedly. It's so crazy it just might work.

He is looking for a woman "within approximately five years of [his] age (21-30)" and a child or children that share his "Aryan ancestry".

So what’s the cost of living for a fake family? It’s a bargain at $100 for each ‘photo taking session’, although he does get naming rights on your children. Marissa and Logan for your information. All photographs will be of a fun, family friendly nature and will be immediately deleted once I am formally hired. They will be no longer needed, since that wage bracket will be carried to other establishments in the future and once that wage level has been set, the fact that I drop money on all aluminum racing radiators instead of baby formula will be irrelevant.

If this is just the application, we worry how far he’d go in an interview…