10 Things… The Unofficial Commandments of an Irish household

The Irish household is a wonderful place to be, if you play by the rules. You never want to face the wrath of granny, so make sure to abide by these 10 commandments and you’ll be just fine. 

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Thou shalt never leave the house without making sure the immersion is turned off

This dates back to the time you were half way to Mosney for the summer holidays and had to turn back to check.

 

Thou shalt always know who said mass, and bring home a newsletter

Also, who else was there, and what the style was like – mammy will want to know.  

 

Thou shalt never let the heat escape

If the range is on (363 days a year), kitchen doors must be opened and closed at lightning speed. Do. Not. Let. The. Heat. Out.

 

Thou shalt never say just one goodbye to end a phone conversation.

The very height of rudeness! At least seven byes are necessary. Bye, bye bye bye, bye bye, bye.

 

Thou shalt never accept no for an answer when offering a cup of tea for the first time

You must do nothing short of holding the visitors mouth open and pouring it down their throat, for fear they’d think you rude.

 

Thou shalt never finish dessert on the first day it’s available.

Christmas cake will last you a year, and even the Sunday Vienetta should go back in the freezer and do you for Monday. Is it savages you are? 

Though shalt never make a mess in The Good Room

Take your feed off of that table. This room IS FOR VISITORS!

 

Though shalt sprint for the clothesline at the first drop of rain.

The race from the back door to the clothesline once that sky clouds over could train Olympians.

 

Thou shalt not watch anything other than the Late Late on a Friday Night

It unites the entire country in something to give out about, and if you think you’re switching over to The Channels while it’s on, you’ve another think coming.

 

Thou shalt never point out that the family has been having the same conversation every day for the past twenty years

Soft day out isn’t it? It is, but sure there’s a grand stretch in the evening, thank God.