11 Things Penises Look Like (That We Really Wish They Didn't) 5 years ago

11 Things Penises Look Like (That We Really Wish They Didn't)

The penis is a pretty perplexing appendage.

For something that is supposed to be enticing women to help them to further the human race, few penises could ever be described as conventionally attractive. They look a shade too close to an under-cooked pork loin or Ben Kingsley.

Advertisement

via GIPHY

The best a penis can hope for is to be really sound. They should work on their personalities more as they won't be winning any beauty contests. Here's 10 things penises look like (that we really wish they didn't)...


Luncheon meat

Willy roll scarred many a national school attendee for life.

penis1a

Advertisement

Dr. Evil

How about one meeeellion dollars to never have to look directly at a penis again?

via GIPHY

Doctor Zoidberg

Advertisement

Another fleshy doctor we'd prefer not to have to touch with our bodies.

penis3a

A weird cat

C'mon, it's undeniable....

Advertisement

penis4a

Coddle

The signature dish of Dublin City would put you off penis for life.

Screen Shot 2015-10-26 at 17.34.28

Advertisement

Image via Dave McGinn

Honourable mention: this Bacon and Cabbage 

What is it about Irish pork products?

penis5c

Earthworm Jim

Am I the only one who's been thinking this for years?

penis6

HeyDay Arnold Schwarzenegger

AAAAAAHHHHH the veins are too much.

via GIPHY

DEFINITELY this guy....

via GIPHY

THIS snake is the two-headed penis of our nightmares.

via GIPHY

And finally when they're feeling amorous, they look a LOT like this handsome devil...

via GIPHY