17 funny yet mildly evil things couples do to each other in bed
1. Sleeping diagonally across the bed
2. Sleeping horizontally across the bed
3. Sleeping spread eagle across the bed
4. Sneakily lifting the duvet off them to let the cold air in
5. Completely whipping the duvet off and fully exposing them to the cold
6. Putting your cold hands on their warm, unsuspecting back
7. Coming back pissed and clambering all over them as you try to get into bed
8. Farting, relentlessly and unapologetically
No can do.
9. Slowly but surely pushing them off the bed
10. Stealing the duvet in the middle of the night
11. Then rolling yourself up in it so they can't even steal it back
12. Initiating unwarranted wrestling matches
"Night, love. Sleep wel- WHAT?! IT'S A SUPLEX, OUT OF NOWHERE! OH MY GOD!"
13. Surprising them with a loving yet merciless tickle
14. Thrashing around for no reason other than to be annoying
15. Waking up angry about something your partner did in a dream
"You broke up with me so you could go out with your own shadow, you selfish prick!"
16. Breathing your morning breath in their face
17. Not letting them get into bed, especially when they're really tired
"I know it's been a long day and you'd really like to go to sleep, but... no."