Okay, I get it, we all do it.
Or according to one study about 91 percent of people will admit to doing it. But even so, I do NOT want to watch anyone else doing it.
8 thoughts we have while watching the Other Half’s surreptitious nose-pick:
“I do know what all that intense nose pinching means, you know…”
Any increased activity in the nostril vicinity puts me on high alert. I know this routine. A few exploratory sweeps eventually become a more focused attack requiring repeated pinching of the end of the nose.
“Does he think that I can’t see this?”
Apparently he thinks I can’t see this. Unfortunately, it’s all I can see now. I am missing key plot points in the film because oddly: I Cannot. Look. Away.
“Why does employing the thumbnail over the forefinger apparently make it okay that you are still PICKING YOUR NOSE in the living room?”
The thumbnail seems to be universally regarded as the acceptable method for public nose-picking, as though it is somehow a more casual, nonchalant approach than the aggressive forefinger attack. Using the thumbnail seems to say: “What THIS? It’s barely even up there, it’s more of a reposition than a full pick.” But we know…
“That’s right, have a good old root around up there…”
All pretence at the ‘casual’ nose-pick is over and what’s taking place, just inches from where I am trying to enjoy some Jaffa Cakes, is a vigorous mining of the right nostril.
“Oh, he’s come up with the goods and is now having a closer look… Delightful.”
Now for a detailed inspection of the fruits of his labours.
“So what are you going to do now?”
Here comes the age-old question and TRUE test of character: Where to stash it?
“He flicked it. HE FLICKED IT OFF INTO THE ROOM. I can no longer trust that I am living in an environment free from his snots.”
Ultimate betrayal.
“Do NOT reach for me with those hands.”
With surreptitious nose-pick accomplished, he’s feeling amorous while I feel vaguely nauseous. Time for a little retaliation nose-picking, I reckon.
