“Don’t have sex on a first date or he won’t respect you.”
If you weren’t given the above advice while struggling to navigate life as a person who dates, you at least know somebody who was.
Most of the time it’s harmless enough – the person giving it assumes that they’re just doing what’s best for you, but at the end of the day if somebody decides to lose respect for you because you had sex, that’s their problem, not yours.
Different dates end different ways.
While one might finish with you staring into the distance on the last bus home eating a tray of curry chips and listening to Bon Ivor, another might end 14 hours after it started in some lad’s room in Glasnevin, also with a tray of curry chips.
Both normal ways for dates to end, and both acceptable ways for dates to end.
However, according to a relationship expert, the main reason why people are failing at dating is because they are making the “mistake” of having sex too early.
Right.
Dating coach Jo Barnett recently told indy100 that the biggest mistake people make on dates is “getting everything they want straight away.”
Or, in other words, having sex.
Now, there is absolutely a point to be made here.
Going home with somebody on a whim, having disappointing sex, and never speaking again is not the greatest scenario in the world.
However, going home with someone on a whim, having great sex, and speaking for months afterwards, eventually forming a bond and perhaps even a relationship, is.
There are no set rules to say that sleeping with somebody before you get to know them will mean that all the fun or excitement will automatically be gone from the relationship.
After all, assuming that all the excitement comes from sex is questionable in itself.
If anything, the “biggest mistake” that people make when it comes to dating is overthinking things – if you want to go home with someone on a first date, do it.
And if you don’t, don’t.
Simple.
