Could This Be the Worst Airline Passenger Ever?

Air travel is usually pretty exciting but we've all had that one trip where the person you're sitting beside/in front of/behind is The Absolute Worst. Whether it's a space invader, an ear-burner, a drunken mess or a wannabe BFF, you're pretty much stuck with them, trapped in a tin can in the sky for the duration of the flight. Such was the case for Modern Family writer Ryan Case, who disembarked earlier today from a Vegas flight with one particularly offensive character. Luckily for everyone else, Case is an Emmy-winning comedy writer, so she was able to describe the whole event perfectly via her Twitter account. In a series of tweets approximately the length of one Modern Family episode, the funny woman painted a picture of what might be the worst passenger in the history of air travel.

Sitting behind the worst person in the world. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She was watching Hawaii 5.0 so loudly in her earphones that her seat mate asked her to turn it down. Worst move he ever made. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She apologized in the loudest, drunkest voice ever "SORRY ITS MY 1ST TIME NOT IN 1ST CLASS" & hasn't stopped talking since. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

I want to use mind control to make the flight attendant put tranquilizers in the double rum & coke she just ordered. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She keeps saying "I know David Guetta" in a prideful way. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

I'm tweeting this so one of you will fund my defense team at my eventual murder trial. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

You guys, she goes to Vegas all the time and her table is always next to the DJ. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

After saying "MY ARAB FRIENDS" so many times she slurred "is that SO racist?" then kept on saying it — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She missed her intended flight and ended up here. She has a window seat and I'm in a middle. The universe has wronged me. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She invited herself on her seat mate's Vegas trip. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

It baffles her that her seat mate doesn't drink. She's GRILLING him about it and sloshing her drink at him and I think trying to bone him — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

"I feel like in Dubai every car I sat in is a Range Rover." - this girl — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She said "I have a very racist view of all Middle East." She's talking to a middle Eastern man, also mocking his accent. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

After awkward silence following a particularly racist comment miraculously came, "anyways am I talking your ear off?" & trying to bone again — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She keeps trying to take his photo & claims he looks just like her friend who's GORGEOUS. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

97th time she's asked "YOU DONT DRINK DO YOU?!" — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

I refuse to believe this girl has any friends. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She's throwing business cards at him. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

"Oh those are my Tom Fords." — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She thought she lost her shoes then whooped loudly when she found them as if they weren't 6 inches in front of her. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She just went to the bathroom. My greatest hope is she passes out in there for the duration of the flight. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

I forgot the joy of silence there for a while. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

I can hear her trying to beg the flight attendant in back for something, undoubtedly world peace. I'm kidding it's vodka. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

Fantasizing about the part in the movie Airplane! where passengers lined up with weapons. She's back. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She just returned with beer and made her seat mates listen to a toast. She calls them "buddy" now. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

During her time in the bathroom, she forgot if her seat mate drinks or not. Again. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She asked if he's ever been to Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She said to him "ill take you. We can never be together but we'll be good friends." He has to be distraught. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

Her Hawaii 5.0 is back on. May it lull her into the deepest sleep a train wreck has ever known. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

Now she's cackling and clapping at The Mysteries of Laura. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She's taken control of her seat mate's TV and is making him watch The Mysteries of Laura. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She's listing all the things she wouldn't be allowed to do in her seat mate's country. She should go there if the list includes speaking. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She is taking 20 minutes to pay for her new drink. The flight attendant may rob me of the joy of this murder. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She's pointing stuff out to seat mate on the interactive map. "The only thing good here is Vegas." — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

You guys she just slipped up and revealed she's been married before and is freaking out now in the aftermath. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

Someone married her. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She just kissed his neck twice. Look out. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

The guy in front of her just shouted at her. He's a true hero. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

The couple in front of her are shouting at her. She's slurring "what is first class? I've never been on it." — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She called this guy's wife classless and "to shut the F up" — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She called his wife a bitch. I don't think I'll have to kill her. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

"This is what the F happens when you don't fly first class." she shrieked. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

The flight attendant is confronting her abt several complaints made about her and says if she has another incident she's calling authorities — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She's been asked to stop speaking — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

Her response was "they're not on my level anyway" — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

Then she muttered "bitch" and it's getting very real — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She just got yelled at so publicly. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She's incapable of being quiet, like a toddler but not cute. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She's confronting the people in front of her again with many "shut the F ups". I can't wait to see her in cuffs. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

Police are meeting the aircraft. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

"I'm not allowed to talk any more." she talked. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

I'm starting to think Abdul won't marry her! — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

We land soon and I hope I can get a pic of her in cuffs to end this saga. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

I think she's passed out on Abdul. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

We've landed. She confirmed with Abdul that he has her digits. Don't hold your breath, Nadia. Her name is Nadia. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

She's trying to use her phone but she's so wasted she doesn't realize the flashlight is on. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

A police car just pulled up. — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

Loud phone call. Surprising. pic.twitter.com/WzoK0ApyDy — Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

 

4 cops are with her now.

The amount of empty Titos vodka bottles under her seat was CHILLING.

— Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

Abdul sits at baggage claim, naked and afraid, looking over his shoulder constantly. LOL

— Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

I saw her kiss you, bro. To be fair though he RAN ASAP.

— Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014

Not to be too Nadia about this, but I wish Abdul could have a stiff drink right about now.

— Ryan Case (@film114) September 29, 2014