Fancy Him? Don’t Send Him a Friend Request: Controversial Dating Manual Gets a Revamp

In this day and age there is hardly a woman alive who hasn’t heard about the controversial dating book The Rules.

Penned by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider back in 1995, the book immediately became a bestseller. The premise to the book was quite simple: it maintained that in order to keep a man interested, you had to play hard to get. This meant following a series of rules such as ignoring his phone calls, never speaking to him first and refusing to go out with him over the weekend if he didn’t ask you out before Wednesday.

It sounds a bit crazy, but some women state that following The Rules is the only way to go when it comes to landing yourself a man. Even Blake Lively of Gossip Girl fame credits the dating manual with helping her to bag Ryan Reynolds (hey, if it works for Serena Van der Woodsen…)

Now Ellen and Sherrie are back with a new ‘updated’ version of their original rules. Taking into account the popularity of Facebook, Twitter and Skype when it comes to dating and relating, they’ve given their rules a bit of a makeover. Here are some of the main ones…

Never send a man you fancy a friend request...

Never text, email or Facebook a man first: In the original rules, the authors said that you should never speak to a man first. Not even just to utter a friendly “hello” in his direction. Apparently this extends to the realms of social media now too. Never ask a man out via social networking and, if possible, don’t speak to him until he talks to you first.

Wait at least four hours before you answer his text: If he texts you, give him at least four hours to wonder whether or not you’ll reply before you do actually respond. However, if you’re in your thirties or older, you should wait at least 12 hours before you finally hit send. Oh and weekends are known as a “blackout period” so if he dares to contact you on a Saturday or Sunday, you don’t answer because you’re “unreachable.” Simple.

Always respond with less words: Basically if he texts you asking you if you want to go out with him sometime, you should respond with fewer words than he’s texted to you. If you write a full sentence or use more words, you’ll just seem desperate.

Never send a friend request to a man you fancy: If you send him a friend request on Facebook, you’ll just look desperate, according to Sherrie and Ellen. If he sends you a friend request then you should wait one or two days before you confirm it. Then you should never, ever, EVER write on his wall or ‘like’ any of his posts.

Be fast when it comes to online dating: If a guy introduces himself to you on an online dating website, you want to meet him face-to-face as quickly as possible (ideally within four exchanges). If he refuses to meet you, then chances are he’s simply wasting your time. You should always wait at least four hours before you respond to any messages sent to you on a dating website.

Do you have any experience with using the rules? Do you think that they have the potential to work or are they just a load of rubbish?