The Government has announced today that it is to completely scrap the water charges.
This news comes after an unnamed Government official spotted a ‘No Water Charges’ sign displayed outside a house near Dublin’s City Centre.
“I was walking through Dublin 8 when something caught my eye”, he said. “It was a laminated sign, stuck to a lamppost, outside a very respectable looking house. When I investigated it further, it appeared to say ‘No Water Charges‘. It really struck a chord with me because the possibility of not having water charges had never even occurred to me.”
“So, I went straight to our WhatsApp group and told my fellow Government officials. They were floored. ‘You’re joking, a sign, outside a house? We’d better rethink things’, one of them said. In fairness, it’s not rocket science. Someone has opened our eyes to how things could be and we’re going to carry out their wishes.”
The unnamed Government official sent us a very detailed drawing of what he saw, which will go down in history as the trigger that ended Ireland’s extremely controversial water charges.
It’s important to remember and praise the unsung hero in this situation – an extremely brave and outspoken individual that had the courage to laminate and affix such an influential sign outside their house, a mere nine months after the first official bills have been sent out to households across the country. Your voice has been heard and we are forever indebted to you.
I’ve reached out to the homeowner for a comment and to arrange collection of their badge of bravery, but am yet to receive a response. It’s possible I’ve put them off with an excessive amount of cool sunglasses face emojis.
We’ll keep you updated as this story develops today. April 1st. 1st of April. Yeah.
