Fadó fadó I was a patron of Tinder.
During that time I chatted to and met some outstanding gentlemen, some questionable characters and some out and out bastards.
And while those times are significantly behind me, I have some distinct memories that will forever be etched in my heart. Namely one man who asked my favourite song and proceeded to send me a video spinning his dick to my now tainted loved anthem.
You haven’t experienced online dating until you’ve seen a strangers member revolve to First Day of My Life.
It was creepy AF and suffice to say, conversation heeded immediately.
I haven’t wasted much time wondering what compelled him to do it but now a Reddit thread is offering some insight to the decisions dick pic senders make.
User Drop16 prompted the conversation by simply asking the men of Reddit what they hope to achieve by sending unsolicited images.
Their answers vary from once off bad experiences:
“I did it one time. Not sure what I thought was going to happen. Maybe I thought I had a good looking dick and wanted to show it off, maybe I thought I would get nudes from her in exchange, I don’t know. But, the laughter and ridicule of my 70’s bush was not what I was expecting. Then I found out she showed it to her 80 year old coworker. Never again. Never again” – decapsk8
To repeat offenders:
“I snapchatted pretty much every female contact I had from an “anonymous” account. Some gals several times a day.” – Stringer71
The results were not good for user Stringer71.
“A few of them ended up getting together, doing some detective work, and calling the police. I was charged with 3 counts of Privacy in Communications and 3 counts of indecent exposure, had to spend 3 days in jail, pay a hefty fine, lost my job, lost my apartment, had to move back in with my mom for a year, and alienated myself from a lot of friends. First time I’ve ever been in trouble with the law; I complied with everything and admitted it all straight away – the cops had to stop me so they could actually read me my rights.”
“The prosecutor wanted to hit me with everything she could; over $10,000 in fines; up to 3 years in jail; registering as a sex offender.I’m left with one count of Indecent Exposure on my record for the rest of my life, barring a pardon from the Governor which will probably never happen.”
“It’s the worst I have ever felt, and it still holds sway over me, today. I’ve never fully bounced back, but goddamn it I’m trying. When the judge handed down the sentencing, he looked me in the eye and said, “There’s going to be a lot of people trying to get the same jobs you’ll apply for, but they haven’t done the things you’ve done. Good luck finding work.””
Another user, Tempacct16 sees it as a kinky habit:
“I would describe it as a kink, really. There’s a certain reaction I’m looking for from the recipient and it just makes me feel good. I’m rarely looking for sex to be the end result of it–i think I just enjoy the reaction and it makes me feel like someone’s impressed with me and has a sexual desire for me. I generally send it to girls that I’ve hooked up with previously and try to “make them miss me,” I suppose. Not sure if it sounds pathetic but whatever.”
Which seems to be a common theme. User itsreallyscary writes:
“I have a big dong and I get off on the reactions. It made me feel good about myself, and I always felt like having a big dong sucks if nobody knows about it, it doesn’t work to your advantage. But really I was just kinda horny and I wanted someone to find me attractive.”
For him, it worked and now he has a following on Chaturbate.
“It turned into being a dick guy on Omegle, and hoping to catch a girl watching.”
“It’s pretty great. Shallow, unfulfilling, and cheap, but god it feels good. I get all kinds of attention and constant reactions and I TOTALLY get off on it.”
“It made me really confident in myself. I started working out and got in really good shape and now I have like a whole following that ‘worships’ my dong.”
“It’s really strange, but I imagine this is what most guys who do this are after.”
Some describe seeking validation from the interaction. Wienerdust writes:
“I’ve stopped doing it for many years now, but I used to do it all the time. It’s difficult to describe what I was thinking when I did it? But I largely had poor self-esteem and desired to be “wanted” sexually. It’d work often enough that it created a nasty feedback loop, too.
As time went on though, I did feel guilty about the people who obviously weren’t interested. And info on me doing it got out in an old social circle of mine; bad luck on that one. It went from a problem to a worse problem.”
“I finally stopped doing it because the validation I was getting from it was shallow and wasn’t worth everything attached to it. Since that time, I’ve had a few women I’ve hit it off with actually ask me to see my junk, and I’ll be honest, it makes me feel a little uncomfortable. Can’t shake the memories of those times which I do regret.”
He realises now that it was the wrong approach.
“But it really was more of a misguided replacement for trying to make actual meaningful connections with people I think, which I felt I wasn’t “good enough” for. Overall, I’ve got a lot healthier take on relationships in general now that I’m older, let alone internet grabass. Which I’m thankful for.”
But for one user he gets exactly what he wants:
“Blowjobs.”
“I used to travel a lot for work. I’d be in different cities for a day or two and then have to move on.”
“My options were jerk off, try to talk up some random girl with limited success or send dick pics to girls who I was attracted to in the city and talk to the girls who were interested in what they saw.
While it’s not 100% successful it works more often than people will admit. Girls who don’t go for it are loud about being against it. Girls who do go for it don’t really brag about how they blew a stranger who sent them a dick pic. But those girls definitely exist.”
