“It doesn’t seem to work as well as it did in my head.”
A woman has opened up about wanting to change her daughter’s name after ten months.
Mumsnet user AutumnName wrote on the parenting forum that she was seriously considering making the change because her mother has joked about it.
She gave birth to a little girl last October and called her Autumn. She explained that she liked the look and sound of the name in her head but that it has lead to problems.
“Since using it as a name, it doesn’t seem to work as well as it did in my head?” she said.
“Lots of people don’t get it. My mum actually makes jokes about it – ‘I can’t wait to see my grandaughter who hasn’t got a proper name‘ or she directly speaks to her and says ‘you might as well have been named “Season”‘. No one else really says anything, but I feel like they think the same. I’m just really close to my mum, so she probably feels like she can say it.
“She has wanted her to be Matilda for years. Matthew for a boy… I often hear her say “you’d like to be a little Tilly wouldn’t you? I just don’t know how to stop it, I’ve cried in front of her about it and she says she’ll be crying many more tears when she goes to school
I love my mum, but I just don’t know how to get past this.
Mumsnet swiftly came to the mum’s defence, with all but a handful of other users saying a child’s name is a parent’s choice.
“Wow your mum sounds really horrible! I can guarantee that no one else feels as strongly about your daughter’s name as your mum. I like Autumn. If you change her name because of this what will you do? Just let your mum pick it and hope you like it to?”
“I think it’s a lovely name. You can change it easily but don’t do that just because your mum makes snarky comments.”
“I had a similar wobble. Only solution is OWN it, say it loud and proud and use it in conversation rather than saying she or baby.”
“Autumn is a perfectly valid, and lovely, name. Do you like it, OP? Because she’s your daughter, not your mum’s!”
“I thought I was close to my mum until I realised our relationship was actually entirely unhealthy. Her comments are horrid and actually quite controlling – she doesn’t like the name so she is needling away at you.”
Babies begins to recognise their own names between five and seven months, according to BabyCenter.com, but it’s not clear what effect changing the name has on a child.
A quick search online sows that baby name remorse is a relatively common phenomenon, but if it’s someone else’s disapproval that’s niggling at you, is it worth changing the name.
