Have you ever slipped up with some of these sentences?

There's an adage that's true about most relationships, whether their romantic, platonic or professional. You can say the right thing a million times and nothing major will come of it, but say the wrong thing once and you won't hear the end of it. Any experience of that? When it comes to conversing with your partner, we're certain that you're all smooth, thoughtful and intelligent talkers, but as we all know, there are some phrases that cause an eruption of an argument. Writing for Psychology Today, Clinical Psychologist Alexandra Solomon Ph.D. has revealed the three most common things that you should never, ever say to your partner. While statements like 'I'm sleeping with your friend', 'all of a sudden, I find you revolting' or 'I'd rather live on the moon than be with you' are obviously a big non-no, they're not exactly common utterances in a relationship...we hope! So while the above are obvious, here are some not so obvious things you should avoid saying.

1) 'If you loved me, you would…'

In fairness, I have definitely used this as a joke when I'm too lazy to get my charger upstairs but obviously, it should be used in any serious manipulative manner. Explainer: When you say this, you are saying that you really want your partner to say or do something. The problem is that your partner can easily say back to you, “Well, if you loved me, you wouldn’t ask me to…” It is far more “intimacy-inviting” (as I describe it in my book) to say, “I am having such a hard time understanding what is keeping you from doing this. The story I am telling myself is that you must not love me very much.

2) Why isn’t it like it used to be between us?

While some people hate change it is important to accept that things are never going to stay exactly the same. And if they were, you'd probably get quite bored anyway. Explainer: When people say this, they are fighting against the reality that love changes over time. The way you feel during the first year of a relationship is not the same as you feel in the seventh. And wishing the relationship was the way it used to be keeps you stuck in a fairy tale. Instead, ask for what you want, right here, right now. “I want us to go out on dates like we used to do,” or, “I would love for you to give me a massage like you used to.” Does this make you more vulnerable? Yes. More likely to get you what you want? Yes!

3) You’re acting just like your mother/father/uncle!

Explainer: A comment like this will likely trigger a defensiveness in a partner. And you're also implying there's something bad about that family member. Arguments to a certain extent are healthy, but if you're going to have it out with a partner avoid these sentences.