How One Direction Will Spend Their Time Off 5 years ago

How One Direction Will Spend Their Time Off

Last night, One Direction made their final X Factor appearance ahead of their hiatus.

It was a difficult and emotional watch, mostly because Harry was dressed like a tablecloth.

Advertisement

Not content with wondering what will happen to the crew, I have enlisted the help of a ouija board to determine what lies ahead for the four lads. Let's take a look at the results.


Harry

Once One Direction finish, Harry will turn his hand to the world of fashion design. Not a curtain in the world will be safe once Hazza gets his hands on them. It's very likely Harry will also have a few side projects, which will lead to him branching into the world of murder mystery whilst battling a crippling Yop addiction. "Everything happens for a reason", he'll say as Scotland Yard burst through the doors of his multi-million pound house in Surrey, raiding crates upon crates of Strawberry Yop. When One Direction enter talks about getting back together, Harry will need to be Yop-free for at least six months before his former bandmates will accept him back into the group.

Police officer making an arrest, putting a young man in handcuffs into the back seat of his police car.

Niall

Our Niall will return to his beloved Mullingar as soon as his One Direction duties wrap up. He'll spend a large portion of his time finding out what the word 'hiatus' actually means, then embark on a spiritual journey to Knock. It's likely that Niall will get quite restless and turn his efforts towards presenting. Brian Ormonde will put up a good fight, but inevitably, Niall will secure the coveted role as the presenter of Winning Streak. An unprecedented accident with a knife while slicing open a three star entry envelope will cut short Niall's presenting career, at which point he will settle down with Brian O' Driscoll and Amy Huberman's eldest daughter, Flumpty.

Advertisement

Niall Presenting

Liam

Liam will spend thousands on having reconstructive surgery to look like Noel Edmonds. He will liaise with Harry in terms of 'jazzy' clothing options and the pair will look into doing some photography together. After being unsuccessful in securing work as a Noel Edmonds tribute act, Liam will enter the family business of window sales, Payne's Panes. Liam will really find himself during this time, along with the remedy for removing small scratches from household objects - simply rub a walnut on it! Who knew!

Television Programme: Deal Or No Deal with Noel Edmonds.

Louis

Advertisement

The bad boy  of the group, Louis will focus on becoming a father to his first child, then his second, third, fourth and fifth. His devoted marriage to Yoko Ono will come under strain when Yoko forces him to change his surname to Tomlinsono. They will overcome their differences and bring their children up on a remote island near Norway. Afternoons will be filled with tales of Louis' success and wild days with One Direction. His children will request proof of said success, but unfortunately, all photographs and video footage of the band will be destroyed in a bizarre bout of worldwide global warming.

LAS VEGAS - JUNE 26: (L-R) Yoko Ono and Sir Paul McCartney stand next to a plaque of John Lennon during a dedication ceremony for the plaque and one for George Harrison as part of the first anniversary celebration of "The Beatles LOVE by Cirque du Soleil" show at the Mirage Hotel & Casino June 26, 2007 in Las Vegas, Nevada. (Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images) *** Local Caption *** Paul McCartney;Yoko Ono

Honourable mention to Zayn who will probably do very well for himself during One Direction's hiatus. Gone but never forgotten x