Victoria Smurfit’s best parenting advice: ‘Always find the funny’

“You can sense the turn is coming”

As a mother of three, Smurfit’s insight into handling the inevitable challenges of raising teenagers is refreshingly candid  - and unexpectedly funny.

Smurfit spoke about the shift many parents experience as their once “perfect, beautiful angelic daughters” grow up and enter their teenage years. 

She told us: “You can sense the turn is coming.” 

As her daughter Evie approached her teen years, Smurfit didn’t wait for the first outburst to surprise her. Instead, she approached the topic head-on with an unusual but clever strategy.

"I said to Evie, ‘One day, you're going to wake up and you're going to hate me, and you're going to be really angry and not know why,’" Smurfit explained. 

Initially, her daughter was shocked at the idea, and said: “I would never do that.” But Smurfit, in a manner only an experienced parent could, assured her it would happen. 

In preparation for those moments of frustration, Smurfit laid down one simple ground rule: vent as much as you need to, but “always end with something funny”.

"You can shout and roar and yell. You can say the most appalling things you want, you can slam the door," Smurfit told her daughter, "but you always have to end with a funny." 

The genius of this approach diffuses tension, reminding both parent and child that, despite the storm of teenage fury, there is still room for laughter.

Smurfit then told us about one such moment when her daughter, Evie, was letting out her frustrations. 

After a burst of teenage fury, Smurfit waited for the agreed-upon punchline. Evie looked at her mum, dressed in green dungarees, and snapped, “And you look like a giant leprechaun toddler.”

Both mum and daughter burst into laughter - the tension evaporating.

Smurfit explained that this is the beauty of her approach: “We sit down on the floor, we start laughing. So always end with the funny. That would be my best tip.”

READ MORE: