The 6 Intense Stages Of Going On A Weekend Break
Weekend breaks, am I right?
They're a real treat and it's always nice to have something to look forward to.
Between the planning and actually going on the trip, there's a lot to get carried away with.
Here's the six stages you'll experience when you make the potentially life-changing decision to embark on a weekend break.
Half the fun of a weekend break is fantasizing about it for months before you actually decide to book anything. You slow your pace ever so slightly as you walk past the travel agents, Skyscanner becomes your most frequently used app and by Christ your work computer won't know what hit it with all the browsers you have open during the day. Enjoy this stage. It breaks up the day and sure isn't it nice to let the mind wander from time to time?
Right, you've done a thesis-amount of research into this holiday. Now it's time to get that shit locked down. Pen and paper at the ready, printer full of ink. You've obviously been monitoring the flights and clearing your cache after each browsing session, standard. It's showtime. No insurance, only carry-on luggage and a cheap enough hotel. Sure all you'll be doing is sleeping there!
A certain amount of calm ensues after it's all booked. You can just kick back and enjoy the feeling of having something to look forward to. It's also a pretty impressive excuse for getting out of doing terrible things. "Sorry Susan, I'd love to head along to that yoga retreat but I'll be in Minsk with himself for the weekend. I'll make the next one". You will in your back make the next one.
If there's one thing a girl loves, it's a good list. Shopping lists, to do lists, wishlists, Schindler's List. All great fun! For a weekend away there's a limitless amount of lists you can get carried away with. Packing list, purchase list, recommendations from other people and even the well-intentioned sightseeing list. Ticking things off a list is like heroin, presumably.
The Weekend Break Itself
Get to the airport six hours early. Get a pint and use the photo to check in on Facebook. If a weekend break isn't polluted all over social media, did it ever actually happen? Pick the absolute best aspects of the holiday and drench them in the Valencia Instagram filter, as the Lord himself would've wanted. It's also essential that you check in on Facebook when you land home as well, complete with a sad face emoji.
The Bragging Period
For up to six years after the weekend break, you are perfectly entitled to drop it into every conversation that you see fit. Lashing rain? Tell everyone within earshot that the weather was incredible in Copenhagen. Kettle broken in work? Inform every one of your colleagues that the coffee in Belarus was sensational. Your friend's new boyfriend is Russian? Tell him you weren't Russian to get home from Prague!