A bride has come under fire after she demanded her bald friend wear a wig to “match” the other bridesmaids on her wedding day.
The friend took to Reddit’s Am I The Asshole? forum to ask for advice on what she should do.
She explained that growing up, she hadn’t been allowed to cu their hair because “hair is a woman’s crown”.
“It was down to my knees by the time I escaped [home] at 18,” she added.
Since she left home, she said that she has kept her hair either in a pixie cut, a buzz cut or she has been bald as she can’t stand “the heavy feeling of long hair or all the brushing/washing/detangling after dealing with it for so many years.”
The woman said that at the moment, she has her head totally shaved for the summer.
She continued:
“One of my good friends is getting married in August and she chose me to be one of her bridesmaids.
“Everything had been cool, she’s always been the sweetest person and she showed no signs of going Bridezilla before this, until she called me up about three weeks ago and asked me if I could do her a favor and wear a wig to her wedding.
“She explained that she wanted all of her bridesmaids to match and that she wanted us all to look good in the pictures. I told her I really didn’t want to get a wig, and we’ve been on bad terms ever since.”
The would-be bridesmaid added that all of their mutual friends are on the bride’s side, telling her that “it’s just a a wig” and “it’s not like she’s asking you to grow out your hair for the wedding, so she’s not the one being unreasonable.”
She said:
“The thing is, I don’t know how many of you will be aware of this but a wig that will actually look good/realistic is expensive. I’ve already paid for a bridesmaid’s dress, new shoes, and plane tickets, as well as a small deposit for the person who’s going to do our makeup.
“This wedding has already cost me a fortune. I could afford a wig if I wanted to, but do I really want to spend the money on something I’ll never wear again when I’ve already spent a ton? Not really.
“Also, this is going to be on a plantation in Louisiana. In August. I’m already going to be hot and uncomfortable, and a wig will make things a thousand times worse.”
The woman explained she was hurt by the bride’s request as she felt her friend was telling her she looked bad.
She said:
“I feel like it implies I look bad because I don’t have hair, which I personally don’t think is true. Is being bald so hideous I’ll ruin her pictures?
“Is she going to make her balding father wear a toupee? And I think the ‘I want us to match’ thing is stupid. We’re already wearing matching dresses, why isn’t that enough?
“I know it’s ‘her day’ and we’re supposed to make her happy, but isn’t there a line?
“I’ve offered to wear a cute headscarf as a compromise if my bald head is that offensive, but she’s not having it. I’m still in the bridal party and invited but I don’t know for how much longer, honestly.”
Many people disagreed with the bride’s feelings on the matter, reassuring the bridesmaid that “you shouldn’t have to change your appearance to be part of a wedding.”
One person said:
“If she had a problem with your appearance then why the hell did she make you her bridesmaid? You’re a friend? Well friends don’t try and change their friends to satisfy their vanity issues.”
Another person wrote:
“She asked you knowing you are bald in the summer. This isn’t a big change you made right before the wedding (which is your choice, but tends to stress brides out so it’s more understandable).
“I’d step out of the wedding, this will only get worse if she’s that concerned about some pictures…”
Someone else commented:
“The bride wanting you to wear a wig to ‘look good in photos’ is ridiculous and just insulting.”
