It’s Enya’s birthday!!
There’s only one way to celebrate this majestic goddess’ big day, and that’s by imagining multiple humorous scenarios that involve Enya going about her business.
Here’s 18 things it’s funny to think about Enya doing.
Enya putting her weighing scales on Done Deal and calling it ‘Sale A Weigh’.
Enya refusing to provide a surname at airport security because they should fucking know who she is.
Enya causing divilment in the Killiney library by putting Harry Potter in the autobiography section.
Enya sending home a postcard to herself while on holidays to see who makes it back first.
Enya holding her cats up one by one to recreate that famous scene from The Lion King, but changing the words to ‘I AM ENYA’.
Enya buying two Clannad CDs in Golden Discs because she still feels bad for leaving them.
Enya furiously denying that her first name is actually Eithne, at which point her parents produce her long-form birth certificate and she sighs in defeat, whispering, ‘But I’m Enya’.
Enya‘s pale skin being fried to a crisp in the sun when she mistook a bottle of aftersun for suncream and spent the day out the back horsing through Jacqueline Wilson books.
Enya renaming Jenga to ‘Jenya’ and forcing her board game night guests to do the same.
Enya sniggering at this ridiculous tweet:
kEnya pic.twitter.com/A3anWJH5h7
— Ciara Knight (@Ciara_Knight) March 8, 2015
Enya realising that she literally lives in a castle and has a fortune of about €105 million, so she rightfully splurges out on a takeaway.
Enya taking the train to Belfast on a whim to see what all the fuss is about, only to arrive there, buy a chicken sandwich and return straight home. “Very expensive sandwich”, she chuckles.
Enya bursting with laughter after coming up with the following joke:
Knock Knock
Who’s there
Enya
Enya who?
Enya haven’t the courtesy to just invite me in without all these questions!
Enya marking her height on the back of the kitchen door only to see that she hasn’t grown in the last forty years.
Enya buying a watch and responding to the jeweller’s query as to the requirements of her new watch by saying ‘Only Time’.
Enya dusting her hundreds of awards and using them as doorstops, weights for weight lifting, scarecrows and ornamental decorations scattered around the castle.
Enya looking at herself in the mirror and saying “I’m Enya, bitch. Bow down”.
Enya referring to her period as her Orinoco Flow.
