Geordie Shore star Vicky Pattison has revealed she contemplated suicide following her arrest and the breakdown of her relationship last year.
The 26-year old, who was suspended from filming the MTV reality show after attacking a model in July 2013, wrote about the emotional time in her new book
Nothing But The Truth.
She wrote: "I felt like all I was doing was messing up and embarrassing my family. I had lost everything I had going for me and I didn’t want to live any more. I couldn’t see any other way out".
The television personality also spoke out about the troubling time following her split from ex-fiancé and co-star Ricci Guarnaccio.
"I was so down in the weeks that followed I genuinely contemplated killing myself at times," she continued. "I am dramatic about things when it comes to love or my mates, but I had never in my life before suffered from serious depression or considered suicide".
Vicky went on to plead guilty to the assault in January and was sentenced to 180 hours of unpaid community service. She credits counselling and the support of her sister for getting her through the tough time.
She explained: "Things couldn’t get any worse and I said to myself, 'Stop lying on the f***ing sofa feeling sorry for yourself. Get up, go to the gym, see your friends, and if
Geordie Shore don’t want you back then it’s not meant to be.'
"It was that fighting instinct in me, and my amazing sister and friend who got me through that made me realise that I would achieve nothing by killing myself".
If you or someone close to you is affected by depression or suicide, find more information and support at Pieta House or alternatively, check in with one of these free service groups here for confidential advice. 
